Nitrogen Wishes

What if I told you I don’t always feel like an optimist
That beyond the fog and growing mist
A doubt still holds on to any sense of stable understanding
Briefest sanity shakes on loosest standing

This must be the consequence of identifying
Our plot-line of stories intertwined
As part of Humanity of a total whole
A conflicted history of which the victors wrote
An ever-changing tale of Yes and of No
Cognizant of choices resonating with my soul
My flow
Amazingly aware in what it means to grow
That if you put effort into your life
You could reap what you’ve always sown

But this lack of guarantee doesn’t give me the thrill
That a roll of dice for a dollar surely will
Instead, an uncertainty grows, impossible to kill
Doubt overwhelming when contemplating my free will
For the answers remain elusive
No one knows the truth underneath
And yet I attempt to preach with such capacity
Such audacity to take this electronic megaphone to the world
And write as if I’ve got it all figured out
That when all is said and done, I’ve conquered all my doubts

I’m here to say that’s farthest from the truth
This battle between confidence and uncertainty
Lingers long beyond my youth
Let me announce that I have no answers
I merely seek to craft thoughts into rhymes
As recently it’s been the best way to calm my mind
So many questions and answers to find
Yet none available, we remain oh! so blind
To what is truly underneath
The atoms of bed sheets
The air of which we breathe

Science and philosophy still falling short
In the realm of understanding totality of existence
With polarity in persistence
Of patterns and opposites
Lightness and darknesses
Suffering alongside this one bliss
Every breath of air the chance for a new wish
A fresh sense of courage for the story still unfinished
Comprised of the hero with a heart not diminished
But rather, still focused on making growth his one mission

Photographer: Lee Scott

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