thoughts

Dreams in the Mirror: Part 1

To see the path
But walk a way
I’ve done the math
And I’ve got to say
That something’s just not adding up
In these choices that I’ve made
You can see it in the numbers
It’s as clear as clearest day
That a disconnect
Has brought me back
Try to track
The source of this flack
It seems to be a lack of motivation
Infinite inspiration seems to decay with deflation
While trying to ration this passion
Try to make it ever lasting
Cause over and over I hit the breaks
When at the start I said I’d do whatever it takes
My words become valueless
My reflection I try to miss
What’s the source of this?
This enemy of my happiness

If only it were easy to act the better thought
But often I find myself thinking about what I ought
To have done better
Go back and do it right
But that just can’t happen
As the past ain’t so open
Cause this is the present
In the here and the now
If I know what the truth is resting in my heart
Then what the fuck is stopping me from finishing what I start?

Next: Part 2 – 7/28/2014

 

—

Dreams in the Mirror is a 10 part series. It began as a short bit I wrote while venting about self-directed frustrations. During my recent Spring semester, I had gotten lazy with my studies and personal projects. Feeling extremely dissatisfied, I processed my feelings through writing what is now Part 1. Several months later, after the semester had ended, I now find myself commuting to my dream job. During my work-bound train-rides I have downtime to think and to write. I came across Part 1 and began writing responses. The subsequent 9 parts are all focused on answering the frustrations of my past and building hope for the future. This piece has been fundamental in my recent mindset toward life and I’m very happy that I have the ability to share it with the world.

Dreams in the Mirror: Part 1 – 7/26/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 2 – 7/28/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 3 – 7/30/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 4 – 8/1/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 5 – 8/3/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 6 – 8/5/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 7 – 8/7/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 8 – 8/9/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 9 – 8/11/2014
Dreams in the Mirror: Part 10 – 8/13/2014

Fractions of an Instant

Walking to the park
As if it’s a part of me
A living thing
A thing I need
Like a breath of oxygen
Just here for this moment
But once more gone again
A silence eager for action when
Life and death are included in the fractions
Of every passing moment
A series of choices make up how we spend it
And we can waste it
Letting hearts grow cold
Night after night
Regretting growing old
With nothing to show
For time given
Yet only thrown
Into mindless distractions
Choosing avoidance
Through ignoring personal dissatisfactions
Unaware that life is just one internal conversation
Between the future past and present
All represent the current equation
Of a mindset in this moment
Temporarily existant
Embracing the truth
That everything only lasts for an instant

—

Note: As of 7/24/2014, I will be posting every other day at 8:00 AM EST. Stay tuned 🙂

—

Image Attribution (Creative Commons): Waiting time – Philip Edmondson

Cross the Line

 

Where is the line
between dreams and free will?
At what point
is a mountain just a big hill?
Just a fountain filled
with obstacles to be dealt with
One at a time
absence of stress
with an ever-present mind
Not afraid to fall behind
so long as the direction is still forward
There are no misconceptions when you’re always moving toward
A brighter future
A better day
Pushing the boundaries
To wherever that line lay
If it may move out of your way
It becomes clear as day
That line rests
wherever you say
Yet still constrained
By the reality of life’s pains
Lost and broken
Only left with the remains
Of shattered hopes and withered dreams
It still seems absurd to try and believe
That walls can be conquered, goals can be achieved
Yet despite all the suffering, there are those still in need
Of a hero unwilling to give up
With few words but still saying so much
Always inspiring while maintaining trust
A catalyst that shakes off the rust
Of long forgotten hearts
stranded in the dust

—

Image Attribution (Creative Commons): Lines – Georgie Pauwels

Ambiguities

Handrail Reflection
What’s a reflection
When perspectives are bending
Light and reality
Hiding what we see
And turns it into what we believe
This is what it means
For dreams to breathe
In time and space
Ideas and thoughts
Are given a face
But whose face is it really
When a mind’s always reeling
Afraid of losing
Pre-felt feelings
Stuck in the past
With a moment
Never meant to last
Just trying to grasp
The idea
That we are free
Only when aware
Of the ability to breathe
Able to help
Souls in need
Creating new foundations
And constructing philosophies
While building internal crutches
To answer life’s ambiguities

Shifting Perspectives

With this propensity
Proclivity to write constantly
When I put things in a rhyme
they just make more sense to me
So I’m constantly repeating
what I’m trying to make myself believe in
Tired of crying needlessly
when it’s the perspective
that needs shifting
Not just sifting through
the pieces of the puzzle but
Altogether viewing it differently
cause nothing’s really meant to be
Coincidence mistaken for fate frequently
This universe can’t be plotted
Until you see this you wont be free
Still free to disagree
with this philosophy
regardless of the cognitive ease you
experience when every sentence
feels a part of some flow
as if I meant this
wording arrangement
to show you that greatness
Is simply meaning created
of dreamt up words
strung into a smoothly consumed statement

Loveglasses

We wear sunglasses to protect our eyes from the sun.

It also makes it easier to be outside.

Don’t have to squint.
Don’t have to feel the uncomfortable brightness.

How many of us wear sunglasses on our hearts?

Making the lows not hurt as much,
But also limiting the power of the highs.

What do sunglasses of the heart look like?

I’d call them loveglasses.

Ways to make things more of the same by putting a dark shade over everything.

I always feel a little different when I wear sunglasses.

It changes the dynamic of how I feel while interacting with people.

Eye contact is broken. It doesn’t feel as connection-like.

Same with loveglasses.

I wonder how I’d act if I could take my loveglasses off.

Guess what —

Love is as bright as the sun.

You can either embrace it and squint,

Or it can be dulled.

The choice, as it’s always been, is yours.

A Fourth to Remember

Marine Park

Today is the day of independence
So let us remember the events that led to this

Yeah this world isn’t so perfect
As there’s so much left to do
But let’s not discredit the people
Who lost what they didn’t have to lose
Continue reading →

Art * Time = Feelings

A new track
A new canvas
A new animation
A new poem

The first bar
The first line
The first frame
The first rhyme

Time
Time
Time
Time

A melody formed
A background grown
A motion stirred
A thought shown

Time
Time
Time
Time

A song to share
Is one to hear

And a painting done
Is for the see-er

A short clip exists
Ever so briefly
To simply show off
The result of one’s dreaming

And here’s my arrangements of words in a row
Sharing my thinking, just so you’ll know

 

 

Mindful Thinking

Don’t you see?
An understood mind is a fallacy
It’s a joke in the face of reality
‘Cause no ones wrote a truth that all can see
We all see the world differently
Perspectives and mindsets differing
So where we come together it’s where it’s the same
Love is the link that breaks the chain
And replaces it with change
Capable of saving ourselves
Building a better world
Instead of creating our hells
So let’s ring the bells
This a call to action
There’s a reason love sells

A Shooting Star

Love is the answer
Yet fear is a cancer
That takes over all it holds
Growing deeper into different modes
Believe through it.
See the love for how you use it
All it takes is the choice
To stand up and move, you got a voice
Cause this world is affected by you
In the smallest but biggest way
You are here, you breathe this day
So mold your being, time is your clay
How will you shape it?
What will you say?
When its your turn to talk
Does it matter if others just baulk?
Continue reading →